The League: The Von Nowzick Wedding Recap
Part 2 of the draft and Andre’s wedding came to a sad conclusion last night. While not as funny as the premiere, the episode was still solid and The League continues to keep me laughing week after week.
The group is out in California for Andre and Trixie’s wedding as well as their secret fantasy football draft. Last week we saw the secret draft which left Ruxin’s team, which was drafted by JJ Watt, full of kickers and defenses, but this week is all about the wedding. Jenny convinces Ruxin that the group is going to be having a secret vote on whether or not to let Ruxin back in the league, but if he wants her vote he’ll have to take over best man duties for Andre. He agrees and becomes Andre’s Goose/Gander, which basically means he has to make sure Andre has the proper hat on at all times. In the end it turns out there is no secret vote and Jenny just didn’t want to be the Gander anymore, but Ruxin is eventually let back into the league in the end after the wedding gets called off due to Andre jerking off into a custom pee bib, which was given to him as a gift from Taco, and Trixie rubbing away her tears with it after finding out Andre was lying to her about holding a secret fantasy football draft during their wedding weekend. Trixie is allergic to Andre’s semen so she has to be taken away in an ambulance with two eye patches on. Poor Andre, I actually kind of felt bad for him.The group treats him like total shit and his wife breaks off the wedding. Don’t get me wrong, Andre is a huge douche, but he has good intentions and the group just shit all over him last night and ruined his wedding, which he seemed genuinely happy about.
Some of the other highlights of the episode were the Top Gun style volleyball game Andre made everyone participate in. The raiding of what they thought was Ruxin’s hotel mini-bar, but turned out to be JJ Watt’s room. Kevin not feeling too well after downing Ted’s AIDS pills and Yobagoya’ing in the ocean; Pacific Ocean, forever unclean! Ted trying make a secret trade while giving a speech at the rehearsal dinner. A new kluneberg painting of penis Andre going into Asshole Trixie. And of course Taco telling Andre that he needs to jerk off before the wedding night as he doesn’t want “The Juggernut” when the have sex that night. Andre doesn’t have any of his porn material with him, but Taco provides him with a DVD that turns out to be Taco banging Andre’s sister at Andre’s apartment, which Andre unknowingly jerks off to, only to find out too late.
Another solid episode of The League, another week of making me jealous that our fantasy football league isn’t nearly as fun as this league, despite the similarities in characters. Can’t wait until next week when we get to see Jay Cutler and his baby, aka The Cutlet, vs. Kevin and Jenny and Chalupa Batman in “Chalupa vs. The Cutlet”.